Abortion: What They Don't Tell You and What You Have the Right to

There are decisions that are yours and yours alone. Intimate, profound choices—sometimes painful, sometimes liberating, often both at the same time. Abortion is one of those choices. And whatever reason brought you here, whatever emotions you’re feeling today, one thing is certain: you deserve to be informed, respected, and supported.

In our society, abortion remains a topic shrouded in silence, judgment, and conflicting messages. You’re told you should feel relieved. Or, on the contrary, that you should feel guilty. You’re told it’s simple. Or that it’s dramatic. Rarely are you simply told: it’s your life, your body, your choice, and whatever you feel is valid.

At 23 Mai Paris, we support women through every stage of their lives, including the most intimate and complex ones. In this article, we address abortion with respect, honesty, and compassion: your rights, the procedures involved, the emotions you may experience, your body afterward, and all the resources available so you don’t have to go through this alone.

What you need to know first and foremost

The choice is yours

What society sometimes says	What is true
"You're going to regret it"	Some women regret it, others don't. Both are valid.
"It's murder"	It is a legal medical procedure, governed by law
"You should feel relieved"	Your emotions don't have to match what others expect
"It's easy"	It's not always easy, emotionally
"You'll get over it quickly"	Recovery time varies from person to person
"Why weren't you paying attention?"	This question is out of place

The bottom line: There is no right or wrong way to experience an abortion. There is only your own way.

Your rights in France

What the law says

In France, abortion has been a fundamental right enshrined in law since 1975 (the Veil Law) and in the French Constitution since 2024.

Law	What this means
Right to abortion	Legal up to 14 weeks of pregnancy (weeks of gestation)
Right to Information	Receive clear and comprehensive information
Right to privacy	Absolute confidentiality, even for minors
Right to Refuse	No professional can force you to
Right to support	Psychological counseling is offered but not required
Right to a refund	Abortion costs are fully covered by Medicare
Minors' Rights	No parental consent required since 2022

Statutory time limits

Type of abortion	Statutory time limit in France
Medical abortion	Up to 9 weeks of amenorrhea (SA)
Surgical abortion	Up to 14 weeks of amenorrhea (weeks of amenorrhea)
IMG (Medical Interruption)	No legal limit in cases of serious illness

Reimbursement

Appearance	Details
Reimbursement rate	100% covered by Medicare
Advance payment	No upfront fees, normally
Minor	100% refunded, without notifying the parents
Without a Vitale card	Coverage may be available through the State Medical Assistance Program

The two methods of abortion

Medical abortion

Feature	Details
How long	9 weeks of amenorrhea
How to	Two medications taken a few days apart
Where	Doctor's office, midwife's office, health center, hospital
Home delivery available	Yes, since 2021
Duration	A 2- to 3-day process
Pain	Cramps and bleeding, varying
Follow-up	Mandatory follow-up visit

Step-by-step instructions

Step	What's going on
Day 1	Taking the first medication (mifepristone)
Days 3–4	Taking the second medication (misoprostol)
In the coming hours	Cramps and expulsion
The following days	Bleeding that gradually decreases
In 2–3 weeks	Follow-up visit

Surgical abortion (aspiration)

Feature	Details
How long	14 weeks of amenorrhea
How to	Suction under local or general anesthesia
Where	Hospital, clinic, accredited health center
Duration of the act	About 10–15 minutes
Anesthesia	Local or general, depending on your preference
Return home	Usually the same day
Follow-up	Schedule a follow-up visit

Medication or surgery: how do you choose?

Criterion	Medication	Surgical
Deadline	Up to 9 weeks	Up to 14 weeks of pregnancy
Location	Office, home	Hospital/clinic
Anesthesia	No	Local or general
Duration of the process	Several days	A few hours
Control	Less immediate	More immediate
Pain	Dealing with cramps**	During the act, managed

The practical process

Steps to Take Before an Abortion

Step	Deadline	Required?
First consultation	As soon as possible	Yes
Blood test	Depending on the situation	Sometimes
Cooling-off period	Discontinued since 2022	No
Psychological counseling	Proposed	Not required
Signing the consent form	Before the act	Yes

Where to go

Structure	Benefits
Public hospital	Affordable, 100% reimbursed
Private clinic with a contract	Sometimes shorter wait times
Health Center	Often a warmer welcome
Doctor's office or midwife's office	For medical abortion only
Family Planning	Welcome, orientation, support

How to find a location near you

Resource	Contact
ivg.gouv.fr	Online directory of places
Family Planning	0 800 08 11 11
Your primary care physician	Orientation
Your gynecologist	Monitoring and implementation
Independent midwife	Medical abortion

The body after an abortion

What you will experience physically

What's going on	Usual duration
Bleeding	Usually 1 to 3 weeks
Cramps	A few days
Fatigue	It varies from woman to woman
Sensitive breasts	A few days to a few weeks
Returning diapers	4 to 6 weeks, generally
Return of fertility	Very soon after

Signs that require urgent medical attention

Signal	What to do
Fever above 38.5°C	Seek immediate medical attention
Heavy bleeding	Seek immediate medical attention
Severe pain that won't go away	Seek immediate medical attention
Persistent signs of pregnancy	Consult your doctor
Unusual odor	Consult your doctor

The care you deserve

Skincare	Why
Rest during the first few days	Your body needs to recover
Gentle feeding	Take care of yourself from the inside out
Avoid sexual intercourse	At least 2–3 weeks
Avoid tampons	During bleeding
Follow-up visit	Required to make sure everything is okay
Contraception	Discuss this with your doctor

Emotions after an abortion

All emotions are valid

There is no “right” way to feel after an abortion. Some women feel relief. Others feel sadness. Still others feel both at the same time. And some feel almost nothing at all. All of these emotional responses are normal.

Possible emotion	What it means
Relief	Completely normal and legitimate
Sadness	Even a chosen loss can feel like a bereavement
Guilt	Often linked to others' judgments, not to your own choice
Anger	Against the situation, against the circumstances
Ambivalence	A mix of conflicting emotions
Indifference	Just as normal as any other reaction
Liberation	The feeling of having regained control of one's life
Mourning	Some women go through a real grieving process
Shame	Unwarranted, often linked to how others perceive us

What influences your emotions

Factor	Possible impact
The circumstances of the pregnancy	Desired but impossible vs. unwanted
The support received	With support vs. alone
Your personal beliefs	Religious, philosophical
Your overall emotional experience	Anxiety, pre-existing depression
The attitude of those around them	Compassionate vs. judgmental
Conditions for abortion	A warm welcome vs. an impersonal one

When emotions linger

Sign	What to do
Deep, lingering sadness	See a psychologist
Overwhelming guilt	Therapy, support group
Nightmares, flashbacks	Consult a professional
Inability to function	Seek immediate medical attention
Dark Thoughts	Call 3114 or your doctor

Abortion and Relationships

A couple supporting each other after deciding to terminate the pregnancy.

Divergent experiences

What the woman is going through	What the partner is going through
Direct physical experience	No physical experience
The final decision is up to him	May feel left out
Intense emotions	Emotions that are sometimes less openly expressed
Needs to be heard	May not know how to support
Sometimes she makes the decision on her own	Sometimes in disagreement

When the decision is split

Appearance	Advice
Communication	Talking about how everyone feels
Keeping the rhythm	You won't necessarily have the same experience
No guilt	The decision is up to the woman
Practical support	Accompanying them to appointments, helping out at home

When the decision is made alone

Situation	Advice
Partner absent or unknown	You have the right to decide for yourself
Opposing partner	Legally speaking, the final decision is yours
Family not informed	Your right to privacy is absolute
Total isolation	Contact Family Planning or visit ivg.gouv.fr

Repeated Abortion: Breaking the Stigma

A reality that is more common than people realize

Data	Number
Abortions in France per year	Approximately 230,000
Women who have had multiple abortions	About 30% of women who have abortions
Main reason	Contraceptive failure

What You Need to Know

Common misconception	Reality
"You should have been more careful"	Contraception can fail; it's a medical fact
"It's becoming a habit"	No, every situation is unique and difficult
"You don't deserve any more help"	You have exactly the same rights
"It'll ruin your body"	Medically speaking, an abortion does not affect fertility
"You're going to regret it more and more"	Every emotional experience is unique

Abortion and Faith: When Beliefs Complicate Matters

A real source of stress for many women

What some women go through	How to deal with it
Conflict between their faith and their choices	Support from a respectful professional
Intense religious guilt	Therapy, support group
Fear of divine judgment	Compassionate spiritual guidance, if desired
Rejection by the community	Find a supportive community outside

The takeaway: Your faith and your choice can coexist. Many religious women make this choice. Your relationship with yourself and your beliefs is your own.

Abortion following rape or sexual assault

A unique situation that requires specialized support

Resource	Contact
3919	National Hotline for Violence Against Women (Toll-Free)
Health Care Center	Medical and psychological support
Family Planning	A welcoming environment free of judgment, with support
Victim Support Association	France Victimes — 116 006

If you have been the victim of an assault, you are entitled to specialized support throughout the process. Don’t go through this alone.

Abortion and Motherhood: Coexisting Realities

You can be a mother and have had an abortion

What some women go through	What You Need to Know
To have had an abortion, to have other children	These two realities coexist
Having an abortion before I was ready	Being ready later doesn't go against that choice
Reflecting on things while pregnant	Of course, therapy can help
Breastfeeding a child while grieving a miscarriage	These emotions can coexist

Resources to help you get through this

Organizations and helplines

Resource	Contact	What she offers
Family Planning	planning-familial.org	0 800 08 11 11 — toll-free, anonymous
ivg.gouv.fr	ivg.gouv.fr	Information, directory of locations
Youth Health Hotline	3114	For those under 25
SOS Friendship	09 72 39 40 50	24/7 support
3114	3114	If dark thoughts
3919	3919	If violence
MyPsychologist	monpsy.sante.gouv.fr	8 sessions covered

Online support groups

Community	Access	Who is it for?
"After an abortion — non-judgmental support"	Facebook	Women after an abortion
"Abortion: Moving Forward"	Facebook	Women in mourning after an abortion
Instagram Communities	#afteruniversity	Heartfelt testimonials

Frequently Asked Questions

Can an abortion affect my future fertility?

No. Medically speaking, an abortion performed under proper conditions does not affect future fertility. It is possible to become pregnant very soon after an abortion. Discuss contraception with your doctor during your follow-up visit.

Do I have to tell my partner?

No. Legally, you do not need your partner’s consent to have an abortion in France. The decision is entirely yours. You can choose whether or not to tell them, depending on what feels right for you.

Can I have an abortion if I'm a minor?

Yes. In France, minors have been able to obtain an abortion without parental consent since 2022. You may be accompanied by a trusted adult of your choice (not necessarily a parent). The procedure is fully covered and confidential.

Will I feel pain during the abortion?

For medical abortion, you may experience cramps similar to those of a painful period. Pain relievers will be prescribed for you. For surgical abortion, local or general anesthesia is used to minimize pain. Discuss any concerns you may have with your doctor or midwife before the procedure.

Can I change my mind right up until the last minute?

Yes. You can change your mind at any time before the procedure, without having to give a reason. The choice is entirely yours and may change. If you have any doubts, talk to a healthcare professional or Family Planning.

How can I feel better after an emotionally difficult abortion?

Allow yourself to feel what you’re feeling, without judging yourself. Talk to someone you trust. See a psychologist if your emotions are overwhelming. Join an online support group if you prefer to remain anonymous. And remember that what you’re feeling—no matter how contradictory it may seem—is valid.

A letter for you

To those of you who have made this choice,

The decision is yours to make. It may have been an easy one. It may have been the hardest one of your life. It may have been both.

Whatever your story, whatever your reason, whatever emotions you’re feeling today: you don’t have to justify yourself. You don’t have to explain yourself. You don’t have to apologize.

You did what you thought was right for you, given the circumstances you were in. That’s enough.

Take care of yourself. Surround yourself with supportive people. And if you need help, don’t be afraid to ask for it.

You deserve support.

Conclusion

Abortion is a legal medical procedure, a fundamental right, and a reality experienced by hundreds of thousands of women every year in France. It deserves to be discussed with honesty, compassion, and without judgment.

At 23 Mai Paris, we believe that every woman deserves to be informed, respected, and supported in all decisions regarding her body and her life. Whatever your story may be, you deserve support—unconditional and non-judgmental.

If you're going through this, you're not alone. Professionals, organizations, and entire communities are here to support you.

You don't have to go through this alone. These resources are here for you, without judgment.